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Mar 3, 2009
Foundation of The Frivolity


Dear Y'all,

Whoo-LARD—it is almost TIME, ma hunnies!  Million Queen March™ time is up-ON us! And not only is it gonna be better than ever—it appears that, despite all the media’s best efforts to convince us that The End Is Near (or perhaps because of that?)—there are gonna be MORE OF US THAN EVER BEFORE! Parade Passes, Big Hat Luncheon Tickets and Bathrobe Brunch Tickets are going like crazy—PLEASE do not delay in ordering yours by Clicking Here.


Firefly™ Sweet Tea™ Vodka,
Barefoot Wine & Bubbly, Michelob UltraComcast,
Mon Ami Spa & Laser Center, and Capital Business Center.

If you don’t already know where you need to be when—CLICK HERE FOR THE O-fficial Schedule. If you have any questions AFTER reading ALL of that—you can e-mail me right away at hrhjill@sweetpotatoqueens.com and I’ll answer you—but WOE BE UNTO YOU if you ask me a question that is answered on that page! 

FOR Y’ALL ARRIVING EARLY — Thursday, 19 March, is the FIRST BIRTHDAY of our fancy new shopping center, Renaissance at Colony Park, just north of the Hilton, and to celebrate that and to honor the Queens, they have some very special stuff planned. From 2-8 PM there will be a darlin’ little TROLLEY CAR that will pick you up from the HILTON and take you to the Renaissance. All you need is your WEEKEND PASS to ride the trolley.

Once you arrive, you will find that the FABULOUS SHOPS will be offering QUEENLY DISCOUNTS if you show them your WEEKEND PASS—and to make it even better—the discounted amounts will be DONATED to Blair E. Batson Children’s Hospital! So here is ONE MORE WAY YOU CAN HEP THE CHIRREN—GO SHOPPING!

From 5-7PM, at the Renaissance, there will be a BIRTHDAY PARTY/QUEENS’ RECEPTION—and all the center’s AMAZING RESTAURANTS will be serving food and wine for your totally FREE enjoyment! And the SPQs will be at BARNES & NOBLE, 4-5pm—so be sure and come see us there.

FOR THOSE UNABLE TO ATTEND THE PARADE—here’s how YOU can hep the chirren from right there at home!  As you may have seen on my BLOG or FACEBOOK, we will be selling SPQ™ TATTOOS for $1—to benefit Blair E. Batson Children’s Hospital. Attendees look forward to having these installed by the Spud Studs™—however, for those of you stuck at home—here is a VERY SPECIAL WAY to hep the chirren! YOU CAN ORDER TATTS AND WE WILL APPLY THEM—ALL OF THEM—TO SPQ™ WANNABE™ MARTHA JEAN ALFORD! 

YES! She has “volunteered” (ok, she has BEEN volunteered) to be the TOTALLY TATTOOED WOMAN and you can purchase tattoos AND specify WHERE on MJ you would like for your tatts to be placed.  (There are a few off-limits areas, but not many. And no, we will NOT be shaving her head—that is just one of those Internet rumors.) 

Simply send me a check—for $1—or more—preferably more, of course—made payable to Blair E. Batson Children’s Hospital—and tell me where you want us to put your MJ TATTS FOR TOTS!  (If you want some for yourself, too, send a SASE with your check.)  We’re not running this through the website store because then there would be credit card fees and shipping charges and we want ALL of this to go to the Children’s Hospital.

Checks are already coming in—so if you want to reserve your space on Martha Jean, get yours to me pronto! Take up collections in your office, ask for money on street corners, whatever, we will take any money from anywhere—it’s all for the CHILDREN! And you get to help cover Martha Jean completely UP with tattoos! We THINK they come off—eventually—but won’t she be cute in the meantime? Send your check today to me at: 161 Pembroke Circle, Madison, MS 39110. And, yes, there WILL be photos. Lots and Lots of Photos!

ME ON THE RADIO — THIS FRIDAY — No matter where you live, you can tune in online to www.miss103.com at 8:30am, Central, and to www.q1051.com at 4pm, Central and listen live. You can also call-in/email with questions/comments and try to win stuff. Let us hear from you!


The kid-sized wheelchairs that Blair E. Batson’s Children’s Hospital needs cost $900—that’s just for your basic chair. (And does it not just rip your heart out to even read the words “kid-sized wheelchair?”) They need LOTS of those every year. They also need what is called the “Tilt-in-Space” wheelchair—for severely injured and/or ill children. These chairs can be tilted to whatever angle is needed by the child and they cost $5,000! 

Listen to me—there are children at Batson WHO CAN NEVER GO HOME—their conditions are so severe and permanent that they can never leave—they literally LIVE at Batson—at no cost to their families.

So when you read about the Queenly Discounts at Renaissance, the Big A** Crown Raffle, or the Jell-O Wrasslin’, or the Weekend Pole Passes or the Tatts-for-Tots and the Total Tattooing of Martha Jean, and a portion of the Weekend Passes—THIS IS WHAT YOUR MONEY IS GOING TOWARD. I would like for us to be able—at the VERY LEAST—to buy Batson ONE OF EACH of those chairs this year. WILL YOU HELP US DO THIS? IT REALLY IS ALL FOR THE CHILDREN.


The very next weekend after the Parade, 28 March, I will be in New Orleans for the New Orleans/Tennessee Williams Literary Festival. My seester Judy Conner, Southern Fried Divorce, will be joining me and I hope you will come play with us there. Like you NEED an excuse to come to N.O? Ok, now you’ve got one!

This Saturday, 7 March, Bobby Cole, Spud Stud™ and author of the thriller, The Dummy Line, will be signing books at Books-A-Million in Columbus, Mississippi, from 2 – 4 pm. If you haven’t read it you should. Reviews have deemed The Dummy Line: “[T]he best outdoor novel since Deliverance” and “[A] story you won't be able to put down until you finish the last page.”

Write to me anytime at hrhjill@sweetpotatoqueens.com —with funny stories, GOOD OBITUARIES, and/or Questions about Life Itsownself—I'm often wrong, but NEVER IN DOUBT!

Continue Being Particular—

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