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May 15, 2008
THE White House!

Dear Y'all,

Okay. For all of you who wrote in response to my last letter regarding my “secret”— NO, I am NOT pregnant and thank you very much for the extreme compliment of even thinking such a thing would be possible at my advancing age. 

The Real Secret was, in truth, about as big a surprise and delight to us as a pregnancy would be though.


Y’all know that for the past few years, I have participated in several CELEBRATION OF READING events for The Barbara Bush Foundation for Family Literacy. Most recently, I had helped out with the Houston event where former President Bill Clinton was the Surprise Guest. Well, Mr. Clinton was scheduled to be the Surprise at the Maryland Celebration of Reading in the DC area on May 13 but he had a conflict; and so, imagine our surprise and elation when we got a call from Mrs. Doro Bush Koch, asking if I would CONSIDER filling in for the former President as the Surprise Guest! DUUUUH—ah, YEAH—we are SO there!

Then, a day or so later, we got this beautiful engraved invitation in the mail—from THE WHITE HOUSE, saying that First Lady Laura Bush was hosting a luncheon honoring former First Lady Barbara Bush and would we please attend? 

All Kyle could say was that he remembered his Mama trying to beat table manners into him when he was a young’un and she’d always admonish him with, “You never know, you might be having dinner with the PRESIDENT one day.” Needless to say, she served him a BIG plate of I-TOLD-YOU-SO on Mother’s Day!

It was an absolute Mountain Top Experience to drive up to the actual WHITE HOUSE and be ushered right on inside and taken up to meet the presiding First Lady herownself. As she was showing us the Lincoln Bedroom—in walked President George W. Bush to shake our hands and thank us for being there in support of literacy. It was yet another totally unexpected honor.

Mrs. Laura Bush then showed us the Queen’s Bedroom—which is painted an SPQ-approved pink. She said it’s where the Queen of England stayed and where Barbara and George Bush had spent the previous night—and then she turned to me and said it would, of course, be MY room! It was not an actual INVITATION but I was thoroughly pleased with her saying it—out loud and in front of a bunch of other authors who did NOT get a room potentially assigned to THEM.  Bwahahahaha!

Lunch at the White House—mercy me. I sat next to former President Bush—Kyle sat across from me, next to Queen Barbara herownself. I DID invite them to the Parade next year and Queen B asked me if I thought they’d let #41 be the Grand Marshal if they came—I told her I liked his chances on that!

Soon, I will have a photo to share with y’all of our elite company that included not one but two First Ladies and a President—sitting at the dining table in the White House—ALL wearing SPQ™ RHINESTONE SHADES! Talk about your photo op!

The Celebration of Reading events raise millions of dollars—to fund family literacy programs in all 50 states, DC, and they’re closing in on Guam. If you ever get the chance to attend one, GO—I’ve seen Michael Crichton, Jim Nantz—twice, Jeannette Walls and Amy Grant—just to name a few. The Foundation goes all out to guarantee a really swell time—including LIMITING the time the authors get to read—bwahahahaa! Otherwise, we’d go on forever, loving the sound of our own words as we do!

The United States Naval Academy Men’s Glee Club also made a surprise visit to the DC event—I thought I was going to cry the whole night. Truly the best and the brightest—and the most talented—young men—it was thrilling to hear them in person.

Our hearts are very full—of pride and patriotism and gratitude—at such an incredible and totally unexpected honor and opportunity.

That was our Big Secret—and I couldn’t tell because I was the SURPRISE guest—they were pret-ty surprised, too, I gotta tell you! Lotsa new Queen Converts were made—including two precious darlin’ NUNS who said they were forming their own Chapter and coming to the Parade! LOVED them!

Now—FATHER’S DAY is coming right on up—on June 15, to be eggzackt—so, naturally, we wanna help out! For a limited time, we have for you the FATHER’S DAY SPECIAL—which includes an autographed copy of THE DUMMY LINE by Bobby Cole (he’ll read it non-stop and then you can have a turn!), an “OH NO—LET ME HANDLE THAT” Spud Stud™ Shirt, and a trio of BACON SALTS. PLUS—absolutely FREE an SPQ™ PROMISE CERTIFICATE—for your husband or baby-daddy. This is a $61.95 value—for only $45.00!  CLICK HERE TO ORDER NOW.

The last day to order the FATHER’S DAY SPECIAL is

NOON, Central, Friday, June 6.

Note about the Promise Certificate:  You can order the Father’s Day Special for your husband, if you are in charge of getting something for your kids to give their father for his special day. The Certificate part should come from YOU, obviously, and only if you are kindly disposed toward him at the moment. And, if you are ordering the Special for your own father—the Certificate should be given to another—far more appropriate—man in your life! 

Now, I have GOT to go finish the NEW BOOK!

Write to me anytime at hrhjill@sweetpotatoqueens.com —with funny stories, GOOD OBITUARIES, and/or Questions about Life Itsownself—I'm often wrong, but NEVER IN DOUBT!

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